Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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