Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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