so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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