It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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