just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
