you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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