Jerry, you need to find god
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
