oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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