she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
