I think scott just propositioned me for sex
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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