so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
