Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
