My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize