Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
