just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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