The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
