Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
