i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
