Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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