At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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