I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
