What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
