The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
