4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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