just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
