one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
