Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
