Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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