no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
