Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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