Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
