One girl and one boy is just not enough.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
