If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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