So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
