Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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