Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
