Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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