How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
