worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
She announced her abortion via fbk
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize