haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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