I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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