wat bout pragnant strippers??
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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