so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
