nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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