Already got asked if we're dating
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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