Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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