She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
