she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
this will be a night to untag.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
