So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
