Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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