OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
